[2021-06-15]


what if I decide jus to not to back

what happens if I decide
to not go back to my old haunt?
if i just let it drop away
they aren’t fighting for me by proxy
so why do I fight so hard to stay?


—what happens now when I don’t have a
way to make money anyway
I guess I just starve and die alone
or I find a place that care about more than
just what words I can sling —

if i shall die before i wake
o pray the lord the heart will take

hey
hello
i have a question
okay, shoot
well, um, what if
what if I just don’t go back?
well, i don’t know, what happens?
i should feel terrified but i’m not
really I just feel free
i have so many obligation still
i could afford to live here cheap if I could make it
i’m not terrified to lose my way
i’m not scared to throw it away
i’m not here to be allowed to grow old
i’m here to be allowed to burn it to regrow
i don’t know why i’m here or why the nutrients made me so
why my body twists and turns and can’t stand on its own
why i smash my arm three times